The HAPPINESS OF PAIN

Ruskin Bond recently narrated an anecdote wherein he saw his friend dancing in the middle of the road one night. “Why are you dancing on the road”, he asked. “Because I am happy”, he said.
 “And why are you so happy?” He laughed. “Because I am dancing on the road!”
This tweaked the question long asked and kept unresolved. “Do I dance because I am happy or does dancing make me happy?. Do I sing because I am happy or does singing make me happy? Do I write now because I am happy or does writing make me happy?. Bond was never sure.
 I delved into the question of happiness which has been on the mind of man since we evolved. Do animals feel this emotion too? We are just a more evolved animal, and when we share spaces with our pets, we are never in doubt that they are extremely joyful and happy most of the time, while interacting with us.Even Dolphins and Orcas demonstrate their happiness just as they do their disappointment, and even sadness at the loss of their loved ones. It must be present in all life forms, just that we are unable to discern it.
So if happiness is a universal emotion, why can't we find a way to stream it at the flick of a switch? Can we be happy all the time? Unlikely. But we certainly can be happy some of the time. So maybe we can’t manufacture or stream it artificially. If we can get tickled enough to laugh and surely laughter of any type produces at the minimum a mirthful atmosphere, and leads into a happy frame of mind - can a tickling contraption lead us into a happy state of mind? Maybe some laughing gas (Nitrous oxide) could do the trick if they can inhibit the side effects.
 It doesn't seem to be a technological challenge to produce one. Millions of sex gratifying toys are driving a market, growing at billions of dollars a year. That is surely intended to bring about a sense of gratification and eventual contentment and a state of happiness. So why can't the industry modify these contraptions to bring about laughter, or why can't we find ways to stimulate the wiring in our brains to bring about that state?
I don’t have an answer to that, or maybe there isn’t one, cause I haven't seen full page ads in newspapers screaming about it.
Philosophers say that happiness will come our way if we don’t go chasing it. Surely it applies to love. It has to find you. How do we hang around in places where we have the greatest chances of love or happiness finding us? But hey!, why am I equating love with happiness? Are they made of the same ingredients or come from the same source or activate the same receptors in our brain?
 I am not a scientist, but I can talk about the emotions I feel, when either of these fundamental and strong emotions wrap themselves around me.

 Let’s start with happiness and the question “Do I sing because I am happy?” Mostly the urge to sing should come when we are content or relaxed. I used to sing a lot when I was younger. And I can't remember a time I sang when I was crestfallen or sad. But the thing about singing is that as we continue on with it, and enjoy the melody, the happiness scale too rises proportionately. This is a given. Can you break down in tears and actually sing? No

way. They do it in the movies, but I don’t think any of us will be successful if we try to sing when we are sad.
 What about dancing? Have you seen anyone dance while they are morose, sad or crying? I haven't and I can bet that you haven't either. And as we dance away and enjoy the gaiety it produces, the happiness index will be scaled to extreme proportions. You can see that in a nightclub or an impromptu dancing session anywhere. I have seen my loved ones delight themselves in dancing. It’s infectious and always works.
 So, the point is that we need to be in some sort of neutral state of emotion to kick start the activity of singing or dancing, if we are to harvest the eventual highs of the happiness scale. But what if we are not in a neutral state but in some lesser state of unhappiness. I can say with experience that if we pick ourselves up and start singing or dancing or playing music or doing whatever it is that gives us pleasure, then we can start manufacturing happiness.
A sure way is to start smiling. Start laughing. Let’s not laugh at others, but at ourselves. It is called the best medicine life can give us. People who don’t laugh are seldom happy. Let's humour ourselves all the time. We can aim to find that right balance to keep us cheerful through our journey in life. Easier said than done for those of us who are wired to be serious or less cheerful. Like me. But I know I must shake it off. I can and I will.
If we can do that then the Dopamine cycle of reward and expectations will be fulfilled. We will soon be addicted to it, and will want a dopamine fix. That addiction is something I would want to be afflicted with. Imagine if I am addicted to smiling and laughter and can do it all the time, as my rewired addicted brain drives it.
 I have always maintained that we should hold on to our dreams. “Yen's World” celebrates it. https://www.amazon.in/Yens-World-Yen/dp/9386503751 I dreamt as a boy that I could be accepted as just another boy and not as a dunce. I dreamt that I could wander the oceans above and below dissolving myself into the salt of the air and the sea. I dreamt that I might find the almighty. I dreamt about love and hope and goodness and laughter and life. I dreamt that love was sustaining, that it was not a dream, and that it was a destination, a journey too that was all encompassing. Something to hope and live for and to hold on to.. long enough, long enough to let happiness envelope itself around me.
 I also discovered in the process that everything in the universe has a flip side, and the flip side of love is pain. That cross we all have to carry, in knowing that we carry the burden of pain masquerading as love, and happiness like a butterfly just flits around me. Occasionally it alights and I wake up. I know then that I am truly happy. Sing, dance, write, laugh all day… love and happiness have both found me.